Yesterday was stressful. The day started really well. I found a freshly laundered $20 in the pocket of my pants and I was able to walk to work without my ankle brace for the first time. I had a nice morning meditation and all felt good. In the afternoon though, I got a phone call. I had expected it, but still it made me anxious. The call was from the Mayo Clinic. I’d emailed them over the weekend to see about setting an appointment. They called to set that appointment.

Living with epilepsy is a strange thing. I will go for months without a seizure. Life seems completely normal, except that I don’t know when the next seizure is coming. It’s never far from my mind. After a disappointing visit with a new neurologist last week in which I felt treated with disrespect and no consideration of my experience with my own health, I decided I needed to do something else. I took the leap to schedule a trip to Mayo.

It is both exciting and terrifying to think about going to one of the best medical facilities in the world. Normally, this type of emotional intensity would send me out to eat. After all, I deserve it right? I deserve some sort of comfort or celebration or whatever for setting this appointment.

This time I decided I deserved better, homemade comfort food. It probably wasn’t the healthiest, but it was tasty– scrambled eggs with vegetables, bacon, and cheese. Then went off for a small and super fun yoga class. It was just me and a friend who was leading the session. There were lots of laughs. It was good.

Today had some temptations, but nothing huge. I am wondering about tomorrow though. Wednesdays are often a day for eating out for me.