I’ve been continuing to face an ongoing struggle with writer’s block. I strongly suspect a sort of fear of writing, a fear of what I might learn if I go to deep, but I have no choice. There are words that I need to share and they’ll be there inside me until I let them out. So, I am continuing to work on letting them out. Today I’m going back through old journals and finding bits and pieces to revise and share more publicly. The first piece has no title yet, but maybe I’ll call it Boots. It was written on 7-6-2000 on the shores of Lake Superior while on a walk around the big lake to protect the waters.
I am standing here
on a precipice
looking out
afraid to fly
wanting so badly to walk away
to not
defend
my people
or
my place
but my boots
will not walk backward
like the staff
my being is feathered
and I will
fly
Another story that I found came from a few years earlier. It is called Blue Eyes Flashing and is dedicated to my great aunt Sr. Christine Mondloch. Sr. Christine was born in 1898. She served as a School Sister of Notre Dame, teaching school for many years before retiring. She lived out her final years in Elm Grove, Wisconsin in a tiny blue room in her convent. She was an inspiration to me. She found such joy and meaning in the simplest life.
Blue Eyes Flashing
(a revision of the 3-4-96 version dedicated to Sr. Christine Mondloch who walked on 2-24-96)
Blue eyes flashing
From behind the clouds
Not recognizing a brother
Only crying out
In fear
Imagining your smile
Wishing for you the great beyond
Remembering the cardboard cutouts
Stored away in my parent’s basement
And wondering how the demons
Caught your spirit, stole your soul
All my life you gave me cardboard boxes,
Toothpick flags, and empty suitcases
All your treasures in the world
I think of you of your autobiography
98 years written on one page
I remember the tiny blue room
Charity called your home
I walk the halls and feel your footsteps
In time with mine
Sustainable Life In Action 