50% of special education teachers leave the profession within their first five years of teaching. Regular education teachers aren’t far behind.

I made a midlife career change nearly three years ago to enter special education. I’ve done a lot in my life. I’ve sought to work for social justice throughout what I do. My adult career path has given me opportunities to battle with multinational corporations, fighting strip mining, deforestation, and the poisoning of the land and waters with pesticides. I’ve coordinated efforts to teach adults how to be leaders and organize in their communities. I’ve worked with people with significant mental health issues and those facing huge challenges in their lives like homelessness, addiction, and re-entering society after their time in prison.

Throughout my life I’ve also had the good fortune to work a lot with kids. I’ve worked in childcare centers and in camps. I’ve volunteered with mentoring programs. I’ve been a foster parent.

Yet, with all of this experience working with kids, teaching people aged from birth through elderly, and with a long background of working in very tough struggles, I’m joining that 50% of special education teachers leaving within my first five years in the profession. It was just wearing me down to the point that I felt physically ill and dreaded going to work each day.

Why? I love the kids that I work with. Yes, they can be challenging to deal with sometimes. It’s hard to figure out how to communicate with those who are non-verbal and even harder to figure out how to teach them math and literacy. It’s even more difficult to not let your heart break knowing the challenges your students face and experiencing their anger, fear, and sadness with the world first hand when they swear, threaten, and strike out.

The co-workers that I am leaving are good and caring people who are doing their best. Many of these people I would call friends. Yet, I couldn’t stay.

The system wore me down and I saw that I couldn’t change it from where I stood. It would break me if I didn’t leave. I can only hope that my words might mean something and influence someone somewhere. I’ve written before about the ideal school and I want to lay it out even more simply. Here’s what I see that we need.

1. Schools need to be a creative space for both teachers and students, a space to flex our thinking and expand our minds.
2. We need to be with each other, not with the screens. This isn’t just phones, but also an overuse of videos, computer activities, and other electronics.
3. Teachers and staff are professionals and need both to be respected as such and given the encouragement and space to lead and teach in the best ways possible rather than just to the latest curriculum.
4. All schools need to be community schools, those spaces that interact with the community through events, community meal programs, or whatever else. The school holds and important role in creating and sustaining community.
5. Small groups are essential. Overcrowded classrooms don’t work for anyone, either the students who are overwhelmed or the teachers who have little opportunity to connect and collaborate to figure out the ways to best serve the kids.
6. We need to be able stop and listen, give each other space to speak, and to truly and honestly care about each other each day. Encouraging each other to take those needed pauses and care for ourselves. Problems don’t get solved in meetings unless there is trust amongst those participating. That trust is built in the every day.

I’m sure there must be more, but this is what is coming to my mind and heart. What is coming to yours?